Hey there, you look familiar! Didn't you go to Sgt. Stickler's Tub-o-Discipline Camp in Richmond, summer of '76? I thought it was you! How's life turned out for you? You look like you actually dropped a few pounds since then! Har har har. Oh, my shirt? You like it huh? Yeah I guess you could say I didn't take in too many of the lessons Sarge drilled into us that summer! In fact at the advice of my therapist, I'm learning to take my weight problem lightly, and even poke fun at it now and then. I thought this Irish football game would be a perfect time to let the world know that I'm very comfortable knowing children openly stare at me in public. You only live once right? Never thought I'd run into you here though! I'm actually thinking of starting a line of funny T-shirts for the large gentleman. Yeah, probably a pipe dream but I've come up with so many ideas! Wouldn't it be great to see a fat guy wearing a shirt that just says, "Top of the food chain and proud of it"? Har har!! Well listen it was great to see you, have fun at the game. Hey let's get a quick picture together, we'll send it to the Sarge! Up yours Sarge! Har!
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Ever fuck a fat man? I rest my case.
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