Sunday, July 08, 2007

Find the Four Beautiful Things in this Photo!

Okay, I'll give you a hint!

There are...
Two (2) hot chicks
Two (2) hot testicles!

Why beat around the BUSH about it! HA HA HA HA! Two hot fucking NUTZ! As a side note, does anyone else hate the t-shirt over a long sleeve t-shirt look? Kyle Belton eat your heart out! Also, what's with the pictures on the wall with the kids holding their hands together in prayer? It's like their parents put them up think 'Yes! These will make our ugly, shithead kids seem like little angels!' If they only knew their kids were pulling their genitals out to ruin photographs at keg parties. As a teenage guy I never had a girl 'ruin' one of the pictures I was taking friends by secretly exposing her vagina, but I guess I was lucky and none of my pictures were ever spoiled. Thank GOD for that. I'm going to go curl up to a good Emma Watson movie and cry while thinking about how fucking lucky I am.

Tuesday, July 03, 2007

Seattle Man Discovers New 'Relaxed' Jogging

Are you bothered by the prospect of going jogging and having some passerby confuse you with someone who needs to be somewhere in a hurry? For those of you who said yes, there is an answer to this often mortifying dilemma. You simply need to slip your hands into the front pockets of your pants while your running, that way no one in their right might would mistake you for someone who has somewhere to be. The man shown above was ever so casually running at full speed along the shore at Lincoln Park in Seattle, serenely cruising with nowhere to go and not a care in the world. Even when he tripped over his own feet and nearly fell face first into the pavement, he looked calm and relaxed, never removing his hands from the comfortable confines of his pants. The man was a vision of someone enjoying a lazy sprint at the beach. Learn from him and maybe you could shed a few pounds without really caring about it much.