Sunday, January 22, 2006

Vagina Lotion Commercials Help A Bitch Out


First off, fuck you for pretending that your girl doesn't use this shit too. You know you've found empty tube of Monistat or Vagisil in the bathroom trash. I bet my new Victoria Secret bra that she's got some Gyne-Lotrimin stashed away at the back of her underwear drawer. Sometimes a bitch just itches and stinks down there and there's nothing she can do but squirt some lotion in there to help out. My fav is Kolorex because the box says it's for Intimate AND Vaginal itch. So that means when my whole toilet area is are wrecked out I can just use some of that to fix me all up. You just never know when a girl's gonna catch a good case of vaginal thrush and needs something powerful to knock out that fungus. It's a good thing they have all those commercials on television that told me about that stuff because I would never have thought to look in that huge aisle at the grocery store that is completely dedicated to women's crotches and the shit that comes out of them. Those commercials that all the boys act all grossed out about help a bitch out. Only thing is that when I get the box of shit home they use all these words I don't know like 'vulva' and 'discharge.' I wish they'd tell us more on those commercials like how they keep the odor down and if it's cool for me to wear like two thongs to keep the smell in. I have to go because I'm in a school pep assembly and have to wear a pink costume for the Kiss A Pig raffle. Whatever the fuck that is.

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