Sunday, October 30, 2005

Don't Squirt Anbesol Up Your Ass

Originally uploaded by drippingmullet.
This might seem like a no brainer to some, but after a few dozen beers fine print can blur and mistakes can be made. Last weekend, after I was well on my way to blacking out on the champagne of beers I found myself in a Port-O-Let trying to 'numb up' my hindquarters with a dose of anbesol. The reasons for this behavior are beside the point but I'll say that it involved two cute gay guys at the Spar Pole. Unfortunately the Anbesol was such an effective numbing agent that it relaxed my ass so completely that my ability to hold my bowels was crippled. The results were shitty to say the least. Luckily the two cute gay guys didn't mind and we still had fun, but if I had been with two less understanding gentlemen the night might have been ruined. I guess this might be the point at which I come completely clean of the thing. No men were involved, certainly no cute gay guys from the Spar Pole. I was hanging out in a Port-O-Let on a construction site after everyone left and found some Anbesol left behind in a wad of toilet paper. In retrospect I think it was largely where I was at emotionally at the time that is to blame for the whole ordeal. Self loathing, depression, curiousity and a healthy dose of boredom drove me to explore an avenue of relief the product was never intended to provide. I'm a pretty mixed up person to start with so guess it's a natural progression that when I'm in a funk something is going to end up in my backside.


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