Wednesday, June 07, 2006

Watch Out For Those Fucking Rocks!

It's obvious that the state of things is completely out of whack when a bunch of rocks needs to be fenced off so some stupid fuck doesn't walk into them and sue someone. How fucking dangerous are those rocks anyway? They aren't even piled on top of each other. The only way you could possibly get hurt in this situation is if you were to sprint into them with your arms tied behind your back or fall out a helicopter onto them. But of course the fence really won't help in either of those situations so what is the point. Then again, the fence itself is pretty dangerous because a mentally retarded blind man with no arms could be out jogging and not know that someone put a fence up around the rocks he usually does the splits between and he could crash into it at a full sprint. The resulting injuries would yield a minimum of $1.6 million in damages and with good reason. No one should ever be held accountable for their own actions because everyone is too fucking stupid to do anything correctly. Therefore this fence should be equipped with bumper pads, strobe lights, warning sirens, a safety net and a pleasant, non-invasive paint job. I'm going to go cordon off the paving stones out by my car and strap foam pads to all the trees in the neighborhood. Wish me luck.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

what if those rocks were being segrated because they are colored? Ever think bout that.

Aspen Shores said...

I dropped you on those rocks when you were a kid.
mom