This Is Esmirelda, Her Breath Stinks.

Esmirelda is the new employee who has been hired into the pricing department. She has two cats, a blue Nissan Tercel and chronic bad breath. She came to the company from the State Health and Welfare Department where she spent fifteen years adjudicating disability claims. Her coworkers at HWD were happy to see her go, mostly because of the promotion, but also because her unpleasant halitosis made working conditions difficult. They often left Lifesavers and other various breath mints on her desk, but she never seemed to get the hint. Esmirelda likes to chew on pens and she brought a collection of them from HWD, so folks, watch your ballpoints! She is a welcome addition to our company and we will all do our best to make her comfortable here. Hopefully, her godawful fucking breath will chill the fuck out so we all don't die.